Success & Failure in the Great Northwest
So, famous friends Suzie & Kat take a rental car into the Oregon outback. Here are some of the lessons that were learned:
1. Whiskey & Sherbet
... compliment each other lots.
This was donated to us by Mike --- (name deleted by insistence of his agent), former kicker for the Raiders. He currently makes his living as a bartender at a saloon near the national park we were staying at, and provided us with extremely large Manhattans with rainbow sherbet backs at no charge and tried to give us trail mix, too. He told us about sailing and avoided our questions about his pro football days. I suspect something very Buffalo '66 happened to his career as a kicker.
2. Fire
... is not as easy as it looks.
While our next door camping neighbors had a roaring bonfire and chairs, we were kneeling in the dirt over a few coals trying to burn whatever we had in the car (i.e. roadmaps, rental agreement, etc) in hopes of producing a decent flame:
I even burned the instructions to the popcorn, this being the result:
Everything we tried to cook ended up being simoltaneously charred & uncooked by the time our meager flame dwindled. We were reduced to eating 59ยข BBQ sauce. Pictured are the famous pajama pants I wore all three days, covered in layer upon layer of caked on dirt & BBQ sauce:
We were more prepared the next day, taking time to gather flammable stuff before the sun disappeared, and actually reading the instructions to popcorn, please note Suzie's intensity despite her disinterest in popcorn as a food:
Success is ours!
And check our raging bonfire, on the shore of Diamond Lake, and the successful half-consumed delicious s'more in the foreground:
I even managed to cook a frozen burrito on the grill without screwing it up.
3. A Gorilla Mask
... is a great way to liven things up whether having a drink at a bar or passengeering in a car. Even the most stand-offish people seem to come around when you faux primate. Also, it really lends itself as a polite conversation starter and strangely, several a free drink were happened upon when the mask was in action. Perhaps we are a better looking duo with this accessory.
Ps. did you ever hear about the joke about Portland dykes & gorillas?
There are more lessons that were learned, I am just waiting for Suzie to send me her share of the pictures.
1. Whiskey & Sherbet
... compliment each other lots.
This was donated to us by Mike --- (name deleted by insistence of his agent), former kicker for the Raiders. He currently makes his living as a bartender at a saloon near the national park we were staying at, and provided us with extremely large Manhattans with rainbow sherbet backs at no charge and tried to give us trail mix, too. He told us about sailing and avoided our questions about his pro football days. I suspect something very Buffalo '66 happened to his career as a kicker.
2. Fire
... is not as easy as it looks.
While our next door camping neighbors had a roaring bonfire and chairs, we were kneeling in the dirt over a few coals trying to burn whatever we had in the car (i.e. roadmaps, rental agreement, etc) in hopes of producing a decent flame:
I even burned the instructions to the popcorn, this being the result:
Everything we tried to cook ended up being simoltaneously charred & uncooked by the time our meager flame dwindled. We were reduced to eating 59ยข BBQ sauce. Pictured are the famous pajama pants I wore all three days, covered in layer upon layer of caked on dirt & BBQ sauce:
We were more prepared the next day, taking time to gather flammable stuff before the sun disappeared, and actually reading the instructions to popcorn, please note Suzie's intensity despite her disinterest in popcorn as a food:
Success is ours!
And check our raging bonfire, on the shore of Diamond Lake, and the successful half-consumed delicious s'more in the foreground:
I even managed to cook a frozen burrito on the grill without screwing it up.
3. A Gorilla Mask
... is a great way to liven things up whether having a drink at a bar or passengeering in a car. Even the most stand-offish people seem to come around when you faux primate. Also, it really lends itself as a polite conversation starter and strangely, several a free drink were happened upon when the mask was in action. Perhaps we are a better looking duo with this accessory.
Ps. did you ever hear about the joke about Portland dykes & gorillas?
There are more lessons that were learned, I am just waiting for Suzie to send me her share of the pictures.
posted by kat | 4:25 PM
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